What's happening

When people decide to live together and have children, they hope they will be together forever.  Unfortunately, it doesn't always work out that way.  Life can get pretty complicated. Sometimes, problems arise—not just the little everyday problems like who is going to take the garbage out, but big problems that parents just can't seem to solve, no matter how hard they try.

Parents separate when they can't solve their problems, and they decide they can't live together anymore.

Some married parents who separate decide to get a divorce, because they no longer want to be married.

Sometimes parents split up when they have been fighting and unhappy for a long time.  And sometimes it seems to happen suddenly, when nothing appeared to be wrong, and it's really hard to understand why they have to split up at all.

There are many reasons why parents decide to split up—as many reasons as there are couples.  And with each couple, there might be one main reason, or a whole pile of reasons.

In any case, everyone has their own reasons.  And whatever the reasons, it's never an easy decision; parents usually try very hard to solve their problems before they take action.

If you're not sure what your parents' reasons are for splitting up, you can always ask.
Your parents might be relieved that you have asked, and give you a direct answer.  On the other hand, they might want to keep their privacy. Or they might not be able to give you a clear answer, because they're not all that clear about it themselves.

The worst thing that could happen when you ask your parents why they are splitting up is that they tell you things you don't want or need to know. For example, one parent could say really hurtful things about the other parent.  If that happens, tell the parent that it hurts you to hear this, and ask him or her to stop.

Why it's happening

Parents split up with each other because of problems in their relationship. They don't split up with their kids.

Your parents are still your parents and they still love you.